Kocong not Kucing

 

Kenapa awak ni comel sangat ni. Midlife crisis ke sayang? "Im not Kucing. Im Kocong" hahahahaha cuteeeeee cat!!!!!

~ i wish im not scared of cat ~

Relentless

It has been slightly over 2 weeks of me not visiting here. Im not sure why. Maybe coz I have a better distraction? Or maybe coz I am at a better state? Or am I at my worst phase?

I cant be sure myself. But here I am. Thinking what to write while the mind feels suffocated.

You know what, Im done.

~ resenting? ~

Hari Ini Penuh Emosi

Sepertinya masa mengengsot terlalu perlahan. Lebih perlahan daripada sedetik detik, ketika dada terbeban berat menahan rasa ketidakpastian.

Ada apa dengan semua rasa keterlambatan ini? Kenapa hari ini berbondong-bondong muncul segala yang kurang enak di jiwa di kepala?

Masa yang panjang ini terlalu padat dengan istilah alangkah.

Berlawan dengan kosa kata kalaulah.

Seolahnya segala jisim diri memberontak tidak sabar menemui dinihari. Namun, kegelapan, kesunyian jua yang sebenarnya damai di sanubari yang sedang di acah teka teki.

Sungguh, secebis kemusnahan rasa percaya bisa mengoyakkan seluruh kudrat yang susah payah dibina semula. 

Mengapa tidak hari ini berlalu sepantas hilangnya kepercayaan yang pernah ada?

~ dunia 😔 ~

Redbull, Christian and Max

What a shocking news it was last night. To be frank, since Horner's last text scandal, dropping RB overall performance in constructor championship plus mutiple second drivers swapping, I guess some did anticipate it to happen quite eventually, no? 

After 6 constructors championships, maybe, now the best is to make some changes and hoping for new redirection. 

Sometimes change is heartbreaking, but we cant always be static and expect the same results to be produced without at least a little bit of sacrifice.

Or, as a matter of fact, is this another way for RB to persuade Max to stay with them? With all these rumours saying Toto is pursuing Max actively, I guess it is a pretty fair move too...

Jos is happy, possibly... 😂

Kan best if Adrian bersama Max kembali. Eceh. Acah tahu.

3 weeks and Spa will be next!

~ 2026 will be interesting ~ 

Low Key

Low key missing you

Wait

I dont miss you

Because you never truly exist

I just miss myself

Myself before you

~ 💔 ~

Maturity Over Time

source: F1 official ig

Watched the Silverstone while oncall-ed last night. 

The typical unpredictable British weather hit badly on many cars, but it was so heartwarming to watch Nico on podium finally. 

BUT, yet, it was also damn awkward seeing Lando and Oscar not spraying him at all on podium.

If it were the old timers with Nico, like Max or Lewis or Alonso, Nico would surely be soaking wet. 

He deserves that celebration on podium, yet thing looked out of place for him. 

Nampak kesian gila weh. Tak baik la budak 2 ketul Mclaren ni. Yes, Oscar was not in his mood, and maybe Lando was seeing Nico as a too grown up (such age gap?) hence showing mere respect? 

But still, matured sportmans will put those things aside coz it is a PODIUM anyway, where celebration is due!

Eh kesian la. That scene was freaking awkward. Depan millions of people watching worldwide. Kesiannnnnnnnnn woi!

~ Max is still a masterclass for that pole giving Q3 lap ~

Resume

Since Ramadhan, things have been a little bit of messy on my routine.

Last 2 night was the worse. Setiap sejam terjaga. Entah kenapa.

Last night was a bit better. Thanks to that 4km of briskwalk that evening.

I must get back to early sleep.

I must get back to 60 mins of walk per day (well except on oncall days la kan)...

There lies the problem. 

Im taking many oncalls for the past few months.

Penat yang bukan-bukan.

Seronoknya if tak perlu oncall langsung.

But then it means, less claim per month.

Siapa laaaaa yang sibuk mencipta konsep duit ni ye. Semak betul.

~ i need a proper 8 hours of totally uninterrupted sleep ~ 

Long Weekend

That long weekend, we had a nice last minute getaway. Had the fun that I needed after so long. Although any vacation can be tiring, especially when it involves oldies and kiddies 😅, but at least it will be balanced by the dopamine and such. 

Well, Austrian GP was a major let down. Max DNF. 1st lap and he was out with Kimi alongside. Penat je menunggu malam tiba. But well, slept early and had a good restart in the morning.

Face was burnt but I had to burn my midnight oil quite so often this week. Gonna gave 3 EEOD oncalls, including a Sunday. 🤮🤮🤮

~ F1 movie hasnt trigger my interest just yet ~

The Void

They say it takes 7 years to forget someone. 

Because it takes 7 years for all the body cells to be replaced by new ones..

I dont have that 7 years.. 

I refuse to wait for that 7 years..

😔😔😔

~ O! Allah. Heal me from what is unbeknown within me ~

People Watching

How I missed just sitting around in a random green park, people watching at a strange city, embracing the chilly wind with nobody but me. 

Doing nothing important, but just sipping a cup of hot chocolate, as well as enjoying nice bites of egg mayo sandwich or croissant. 

What a dream.

Planned for Kelantan + Terengganu, got to cancel. Planned for Sulawesi, also have to cancel. MotoGP, also got cancelled.

Apehal semua tarikh pun susah nak dapat cuti ni hoiiiii!!!!!!

Mungkinkah patut ikut cakap my mom - 'jom kita tiga pegi umrah end of this year'..

Of course la aku nak, but the cost per person is just beyond my pocket's ability for now.. 🥲🥲🥲

Hasbunallah wanikmal wakeel. 

May Allah make it easy for me.

~ rindunya Madinah ~